andrewca2 Posted June 18, 2008 Report Share Posted June 18, 2008 Hi, i was out at the weekend and got talking to this bird ,after a while she said "whats your name" so i said bond and she replied "your going so say james bond aren`t you" i said " no unibond and i`m here to fill your crack in". boom boom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lennox2s2s Posted June 18, 2008 Report Share Posted June 18, 2008 Very good :lol: Mus try that chat up line the next night that I am out.....couldn't be much worse than the chat up line I am currently employing to attract the females Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonross46 Posted June 18, 2008 Report Share Posted June 18, 2008 I think that really is worth a try haha, I was impressed anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quadrant Posted June 19, 2008 Report Share Posted June 19, 2008 "Hey, do you like powertools?" ...... fancy a BOSCH? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonross46 Posted June 19, 2008 Report Share Posted June 19, 2008 I like it how these are going down the DIY route .. I can use them at work since Homebase covers all your DIY needs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uberduck Posted June 19, 2008 Report Share Posted June 19, 2008 Hi, i was out at the weekend and got talking to this bird ,after a while she said "whats your name" so i said bond and she replied "your going so say james bond aren`t you" i said " no unibond and i`m here to fill your crack in". I would be fascinated to know whether this ended up in some form of bedroom activity or whether she slapped you :blackeye: ? Not a fan of chat up lines myself. It's either going to go one of two ways and if it is the bad way, it's probably going to end up with a slap or drink over your head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wakey Posted June 20, 2008 Report Share Posted June 20, 2008 Haha! Love these! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wakey Posted June 20, 2008 Report Share Posted June 20, 2008 Not chat up lines, but this made me think of a drinking game I was introduced to last week. I've jut copied and pasted this from another website! Chicago Chorus: I used to work in Chicago, an old department store, I used to work in Chicago, I don't work anymore. Verse: (solo) A lady came into the store one day, asking for a CARPET, (all) A CARPET from the store? (solo) A CARPET she wanted, SHAG she got! (all) Oh, I don't work anymore! (Chorus) Verses * Car she wanted, hot rod she got. . . * S****y Nail she wanted, Solid Screw she got. . . * Kit-Kat she wanted, 4 fingers she got. . . * Ruler she wanted, Twelve inches she got. . . * Stilton she wanted, Blue vein she got. . . * Velvet she wanted, Felt she got. . . * Knuckles she wanted, Fisted she got. . . * Chitty Chitty she wanted, Bang Bang she got. . . * Oriental Optical Device she wanted, Japseye she got. . . * Armour she wanted, my sword she got. . . * German coal extraction unit she wanted, mein shaft she got. . . * 3 Bananas she wanted, foreskin she got. . . * Pirate flag she wanted, Jolly Roger she got. . . * Back door she wanted, Rear entry she got. . . * Lobster she wanted, Crabs she got. . . * A road from Carlisle to Newcastle she wanted, A69 she got. . . * Help she wanted, AIDs she got. . . * **** she wanted, **** she got! And whilst drinking you have to think of your own, it's hard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uberduck Posted June 20, 2008 Report Share Posted June 20, 2008 Ha, ha. Very amusing. I'm sure my mischevious drunken mind could think of a few!! Can't quite imagine how the tune goes to that though (or perhaps once p***ed, tune's go out the window ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Judge Mental Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 They are all f***ing crap lol For a start, how many of the front arsed variety know anything about DIY? Quadrants was funny mind you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonross46 Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 Who said they had to be said to women? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wakey Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 They are all f***ing crap lolFor a start, how many of the front arsed variety know anything about DIY? f***ing hell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Judge Mental Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 woops :redface: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quadrant Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 My wife is a dab hand with the Black & Decker, I'll have you know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonross46 Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 Im sure there are loads of female DIY enthusiasts out there. Got to put the stereotypical views to one side in this current society. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uberduck Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 Who said they had to be said to women? Another reason to use the brilliant smiley I think...... :pinkman: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quadrant Posted June 22, 2008 Report Share Posted June 22, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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