leonard1one

I can answer the riddle. But not your second question. Though I think Quadrant has gotten it, or is along the right lines. Answer to the riddle on the match box. My cock

Cheese. You only need to have sex with Gary Barlow once, or maybe a few times to have a baby. You don't need to have sex lots of times. I think you're just a randy mare Don't deny it. Quadrant. Bringing a horse back would break the rules. So you would have to leave your mighty steed behind. Hard to accept I know. But I' travelled through time now and again, and you have to stick to the rules. Though I don't. But then, I am the Chosen One

Think all the well established DJ's that everybody knows of will soon enough fade away - hopefully gracefully - knowing there time has passed. I'm looking for the new, the alternative, the future! I think Dance will become more Techno influenced. It's evolution. Adapt and thrive. Or be left behind! There's definately no need for all the jingles. We come to dance. Not listen to jingles.

Wish no offence to anyone who is still into Judge Jules, and this is the JJA. But I think he's still around Just because he is a big name, and was good in his day. But time moves on. Things change. Everything has it's time and place. Everything! He has done good. But I think his time is over. He should wake up to that fact. But people often hang on to what they had, and delude themselves that they still have it. But I think it's maybe time for him to step aside, be thankful for what he had, and make way for the up and coming, for the new. Like I said, Everything has it's time.

Was writing a post. Had it pretty well finished. Then for some reason I was taken back a page - so to speak. Tried to go back to where I had been. Got there. But what I'd written had gone. Ce la vie. Yes. You are beloved. And Yes. I am a Mad Bad Bastard. I don't mind that at all. Who the hell is Mr Tumble? Have you been fooling around with him behind my back!

Hi Tom Am always up for a friendly informed debate. Thought it was interesting that you referred to the royal family and having to have a crap in the same paragraph. Though I know that what you said was not intended to be perceived in a manner which contradicts your stated opinion. The existance of the royal family is not in my opinion an inevitability. But it is a fact. If you look at this Country's history it is a fact that for many hundreds of years it has had sovereign's. Until relatively recently they ruled supreme, by the right of God. Henry V111 springs to mind. He had a few heads chopped of. Because he wanted to, and did pretty well much as he pleased. People - the commoners - could do f*** all about it. But - without recounting our nations history - a time came when some did not accept that they could do f*** all about it. They did something about it, and so the seeds of democracy were sown. Things stay the way they are - right or wrong - if people accept the way things are. Many have laid down their lives to bring about change in this Country. So to throughout the World. If they had not could this Country exist under the rule of dictatorship? No? We British are different or better than those who live under a Dictatorship? But I agree with you that the existance of the royal family is the way things are, at least for our lifetimes, or longer. I am a Socialist. Don't equate with communist. I'm a moderate Socialist. I believe that Socialism, if implemented properly could work, and enable true equality of opportunity, and a fairer distribution of wealth. But I don't think this Country will ever accept Socialism, certainly not within my lifetime. Because many people are motivated by greed and the desire to possess, and capitolism serves this well. If ever this Country becomes Socialist the royal family will be put out to pasture. As they deserve to be. In reality they serve to underpin the class system in this Country. I will bow to no one, or accept that they are better than me by virtue of their birth. If I had billions, or millions, firstly I would give most of it away, because I don't need that much money, and it is obscene to have that much money when 24,000 children die Every Day. But if I had that much money I would find it abhorent to have servants waiting upon me hand and foot. They generate massive revenue? Because of the associative history and traditions of our Country. The history of our country and traditions are interesting, and are certainly a source of interest for people in Country's throughout the World. But what relevance do the royal family really have to that. Our history, and heritage, and traditions don't depend upon an elderly man and woman, and their sons and daughters, and their fifth cousin removed. Ask an American what you think of when you think of Britain? Most Americans don't think f*** all about Britain. They're as interested in Britain as? Think of some obscure Country of your choice. I am interested in Greece. Which once ruled most of the known World, and it has been said of was the birthplace of democracy. The history of Greece is facinating. I wouldn't mind visiting it, though the history of Greece is more interesting than is present day Greece I think. It has no royal family. Just to reiterate. Most Americans, when asked about Britain are f*** all interested, and those who have any interest refer to all the inhabitants of Britain - or more correctly the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland as English. Certainly they've heard of the queen. So what. They're more interested in osama ben laden. If someone asks me about Australia I think first of surfing. On a completely different note. I defended Charlie Sheen because I though it was a bit severe to refer to him as a degenerate. I was not aware that he had made anti semetic comments. I abhor racism. I do not believe that Charlie Sheen is in fact racist. But that in no way excuses racist comments. As to him doing 8 gram lines of coke. I would not think of him as a degenerate for doing that. Rather, I would think that he has become psychologically dependant on coke, and has developed tolerance to it, which is an unfortunate state. In the World he lives in I'm sure that lines of coke are being snorted by many, and they are getting high. I like to get high. Dance music gets me high. But if I were living in Charlie Sheens World and coke was always around I can't say that I wouldn't do a few lines. In fact, despite the fact that I know the first line of coke you ever do can kill you stone dead - heart failure - I would almost certainly do a few lines. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone! It's just got a hold on Charlie Sheen. He's on a crazy roller coaster ride, and I don't think he knows how to get of it. I have some compassion for the guy. Regarding his shagging porn stars. I once saw a documentry about a porn actress from Britain who went over to America to further her career. I don't personally understand how women can become part of that World. But she was a really lovely girl - personality I mean. She was beautiful to. But the American producer, who was also participating in the film was going for it very hard with the oral. She was very distressed and had to go of to a room. The documentry makers were very concerned about her, and talked to her, and asked her if she wanted to leave. She's a human being. Just a young woman. I can not look down upon her. As to him not shouldering the responsibilities that he has. How many men do not do that? He's of his head with doing to much coke. Who can say for sure that they'll never fall by the wayside. We all of us could fall. No one ever expects it to happen to them, or sees it coming. Thank God that it's not you.

In my last post I meant pork sword, obviously, and not pork sausage. But I was feeling hungry at the time, so I think my mind was drifting slightly, thinking of food. I do like a nice fry up. Though I am not a vegetarian I very rarely eat pork sausages, because everything and anything goes into them. I do really like Quorn sausages though, especially if done in the deep fat fryer. Though it does tend to mess the oil up quite quickly. I also like tinned Meatfree sausages and beans, which I get in Sainsbury's. Very very nice with plenty of Worcestershire sauce, which you might like if you feel like eating something meaty. I would imagine that a vegetarian diet must be a bit unsatisfying at times. Though my Sister has been a vegetarian since her mid teens, and for many years was content with eating vegetables and whatever. But now she really loves Quorn products, especially Quorn bacon strips, which I.ve tried, and they are quite nice. You say that your wardrobe floats. Have you proved it? By taking it down to the local duck pond and throwing it in. If you had a paddle you could climb in and use it as a canoe. If there was a river nearby with really fierce white water rapids even better. But no screaming in terror. Screaming is only for little girlies. My mobile phone floats! At least it did for about a tenth of a second. Then it drowned, and I had to jump into the bath fully clothed to rescue it. Does your I Pod touch float? My boots also float. When I'm in them! I can walk on water! Not many people can do that. I think I must be special. God did tell me I was special, and was sent to Earth to decide the fate of Mankind. I haven't decided yet. But I'll let you know when I do. Though I'm probably going to decide on Armageddon. Think most people won't be happy with that choice. But sometimes you have to make tough choices. Beat that! But not with a big stick, no fair. Big sticks float to

Briggsy. Had a look at this threadage earlier, and couldn't be arsed to post. But your post is very much along the lines of what I was thinking. I don't see hundreds of people standing gawking at Buckingham Palace. But then again I have never spent any time gawking at Buckingham Palace. The royal family have a very effective publicity machine constantly working to promote the royal family. How many tourists come to Britain, and are really that interested in the royal family. Britain has many many other things to offer as a tourist destination. A Country in Europe has a royal family. Does anybody know which Country that is - without googling. Does anybody know the names of the royal personages. Is anybody interested in them. Would anybody go to that country just because they have royalty. I don't think so. Are people around the World thrilled by the prospect of coming to Britain because they might see a queen - who is in reality just an elderly woman with a hell of a lot of money, and who sometimes dresses up a bit and wears a crown. If they are then I can only feel sad for them that they can't think of something better to do on their holidays. Can anybody find any evidence that the royal family generate any real income for this Country relative to what they cost this Country? Would be very interested to see it. Tom. You said that you didn't mind the 'core' royal family living well. But you didn't like the 356 th - or whatever - in line to the throne getting their snouts in the trough - not an exact quote - but that's the deal Man. The royal family don't give a f*** if you like it or not. You don't get to choose. You like having a royal family? Then you have to take all the shit that comes with it. The royal commentators, the ponces, the parasites. You don't get to choose what is ok and what is not. They don't even know that you exist, and they don't give a f***. I noticed on another topic that a fair few members were complaining about the Government. That's fair enough. I fully understand that, and agree with some posts. But, whether you agree with what the Government are doing or not - and they're mostly a bunch of shisters - we need to have a Government. This Country is up shit creek without a paddle, and the royal family is not going to do anything about it. They're doing nicely, thank you. Seems a bit crazy to me being annoyed that you don't have enough money to live a reasonable life - which is totally understandable - but then accept the royalty of this Country having immense amounts of money, when they've never done a real days work in their lives.

Elephants Bollocks to the wedding. People will be oohing and aahing at william and what's her name getting married, and talking about what designer made her wedding dress. But on their wedding night they'll be shagging all night - not that they haven't done that already - just like 'ordinary' people. I' ve nothing personal against the royal family, they've never done me any harm. But I'd like to see a public holiday declared when the queen - who is the richest woman in the World - gives half of her wealth to to charities which aid the Third World. Which would probably still leave her the richest woman in the World. I can't understand people who thing that the royal family are in any way special, or that us having a royal family makes our country in any way special. Bollocks! Where's their head at! It's time for change. I call upon all members of the JJA board to prepare for revolution. It will be a bloodless revolution, through the power of Dance music. Cheese for our new Queen, Queen Cheese the 1st has a nice ring to it. Quadrant will be the protector of the Queens person - though he said in on of his posts God Save the Queen, so he'll probably be angry with me. The new National Anthem will be Rise - Gabrielle - mash up matt darey remix. We'll work the rest out later. They're coming to put on my special white jacket. Hard to type.

Laughed my bollocks of there when I saw that. Yes indeed a pork sausage does float. A big pork sausage floats really well. I know that for an absolute fact, trust me Am thinking you might be as crazy as me. Though I'm infamous on JJA board as a Mad Bad Bastard, whilst you are beloved by the JJA board, though you speak your mind and tell it like it is. Watching TV, and there was an advert just there which showed a bit of Marlon Brando from On the Waterfront. Absolutely brilliant classic movie. I could have been a contender, instead of a bum. Which is what I am. You should have looked out for me, just a little, you was my brother. I think I will become the next Marlon Brando. Though I can't act. Which might be a little bit of a slight tiny problem. But I can dance anybody into the ground. So should be ok I think.

But then, the majority of people try not to talk bollocks, and I mostly don't want to be part of the crowd. A Silver Panther is a law onto itself. Don't take me to seriously. I'm just talking more bollocks

LoL How big is a big apple? Have you been conducting experiments in your secret laboratory Frankencheese? Big melons also float. I quite like big melons, and medium ones to. But I've been conducting experiments to, and I'm afraid cheese doesn't float. So you're right not to go on a cruise. Though you could wear a life jacket and you'd float. But then the tiger sharks would start to circle, then come in for a little nibble. You probably wouldn't like them nibbling on your body parts. What a lot of bollocks I talk

Lucky you Cheese, being on a hovercraft. Would love to do that. Though I dare say I will. Have flown in aeroplanes, but never floated in one But not very exciting, bit like being on a bus or train, boring really. Imagine being on a hovercraft would be more interesting. Don't think I would have any fear of very deep water. Though I remember once, when saw on news a piece about someone sailing round the World single handed in a fairly small yacht I thought what it must be like to be out in the middle of the ocean, which goes down, down, down, to the sea bed far, far below. Trying to make it sound scary But don't think you'll have nightmares

Hi The-joker. You can call me Leonard The Country is in a pretty bad state at the moment. But I believe that the economy will recover in time. Will be hard for many sadly until that happens. But - from the movie - The Outlaw Josey Wales - we have to endeavour to persevere. Everyone knows of The Great Depression which America suffered in the 1930's. Men who had been rich and lost everything jumped out of windows to their death. But life is more precious than riches. Millions of men lost their jobs, and survived only through the existance of soup kitchens. But America's economy recovered. Living standards improved, life was better. I think things will be tough in the UK for the next 3 or 4 years - hopefully no longer, but there will be light at the end of the tunnel. If you worry you die, if you don't worry you die, so why worry! Every Country tends to go through periods of boom and bust. I wouldn't sweat buckets - your emocation. Though I can't say that money is not important happiness, or contentment is a state of mind

Must be because of your magnetic personality Submarines also float. Why do ships float? No googling Only teasing. I.ve never actually been on a ship. See advertisements on TV for holidays on cruise ships. Look fantastic. But can't afford. Like probably the majority of people. Knew a guy who's father was a Doctor. When he was young the family went on a cruise. He said it was fantistic. That's probably the closest I'll get to going on a cruise. But I'll make do with building sand castles and going in for a paddle I guess. Notice that as soon as Christmas is over there's advert's everywhere for holidays. Christmas is an expensive time, especially for those with children. Then as soon as it's over they start advertising holidays, which can be another significant expense. Sometimes you feel that the World we live in is trying to tear every last penny you have from you. Was sad to hear that you had to sell your car. My Mother had a car for a while when I was quite young. Was good, but she couldn't afford to keep it, so I can understand your feeling of loss. Guess that everybody can only hope that the economy improves, though it's out of our hands. The banker who recently got a 6.5 million bonus, and those like him, are probably not to worried though. Think it's an absolute bloody disgrace that you were given a 5p an hour raise after 3 years. That's why I'm a Socialist. Though I don't think that Socialism will ever work in Britain. I do think that Socialism could work. But maybe that's to idealistic. We live in the real World good or bad. Enough rambling.

Neuro. I thought Quadrant's answer was totally reasonable, his reasoning was flawless, and he put forward a very convincing argument that he had got the answer. Then I began to doubt everything I thought I knew to be true and my brain hurt. Think it was the nice pictures of the wooden salmon that were - nearly - the clincher for Quadrant. If I'm ever up in court for poaching wooden salmon I'll engage Quadrant to defend me

How did I know you were going to say that Cheese Ships are very heavy, and they do float. Though sometimes they do not float. Example. The most famous ship in the World, the Titanic, which sadly hit an iceberg and stopped floating. The heaviest thing I can think of that floats is an iceberg, unless or until it melts, and again becomes water. But you are right. Heavy things can float. Whether something can float or not depends on it's density rather than it's weight. A 1p coin which is light will not float because it is made of a dense material, whilst a massive salmon made out of wood which could weigh many tons will float. Sorry I haven't any pictures of a massive wooden salmon. Most things that are heavy though are made of a dense material, so most heavy things don't float. A needle, which is made of steel, which is a dense material can float on water if placed very gently on the water because of surface tension. If you ever find yourself lost in the wilderness you can make a compass with a small container full of water and a needle. Bit of boring Physics there. But you'll thank me if you ever do become lost in the wilderness and need a compass to find your way back to civilisation

The-joker. Don't wish to split hairs, but if you go back in time and do anything of any significance - illegal or not, you will alter the time line. Judge Mental. How much would it cost to invest enough money in Microsoft, and where would you get the money? Quadrant. Is that a picture of you with your lance standing proud? In Medieval times the currency was groats, which taking into account inflation a million groats would probably be worth £50. I would go back to the time shortly before the American gold rush after finding out where the rich veins of gold were, or oil fields - same thing. Bloody Americans didn't deserve either.

Hmmm Cheese. Examples?

Just looked over previous posts. Was overwhelmed by Quadrant's lovely pictures of wooden salmon - you are the Man when it comes to posting images of anything and everything - and just wanted to say that the first smiley of my last post would have been a wink, but I cannot access emocation's on this phone, can only do smiley's. Anyway. Noticed that Judge Mental had gotten the answer. Nice one Man! Nice profile picture to. Would love to know how you created that. Nice riddle the-joker. But you do think of strange things in the shower - not the rude thoughts, that's not strange. Though I don't - because my heart is pure. Got a phone call.

You really do love your wooden salmon Quadrant. Know you like to do a bit of fishing. But dare I say it, that a wooden salmon would be lighter than a real one, since wood floats, and real salmon don't tend to Two suggestions. A rocket that's left the Earth's gravitational pull. Must be worth a tenth of a point. The other - since you were having rude thoughts at the time Joker - a man having carnal knowledge of a woman missionary style. Think about it. Would have thought of that one Quadrant, you being into orgies

Platoon? Must be thee definitive Movie about the Veitnam War. In which Charlie Sheen played a character who had a pivotal role in the Movie. He starred alongside Tom Berenger and Daniel de la Foe - two great actors, and held his own. Two and a half Men? Watched about 10 minutes of one episode and thought it was a crock of shit. But he has balls! He's been out there and done it. Maybe he should stop doing it now. But if he's a degenerate then so are probably half the MP's of this Country. He just doesn't pretend to be something he's not. Bye the bye, he's not been invited to his twin sons birthday party. Part of the price he's having to pay. But I don't know the guy. So I won't judge him.

I think it's ok to party hard. Maybe to go a bit crazy. BUT. You've got to know when enough is enough! Only Charlie Sheen can help Charlie Sheen. Or he will sadly self destruct, like many who have gone before him. What a terrible waste.

I wrote a post on this topic using a smart phone. It was incredibly insightful, a work of pure genius, and I think provided all the answers to all of the ills of the Dance scene. But though I had signed in, when I came to post it I had become signed out. So it is lost forever. If I write another post and it's total bollocks don't blame me